What a day );

HAHAHASo, today was my apt. with the new RE and well I almost feel as if I wasted 3 hours of my time. My insurance was approved for all diagnostic testing but after all was said and done they told me that 1 cycle of ‘Clomid Monitoring’ is$700!! Is that even worth it? That’s almost my mortgage payment. The next option is the IUI and that goes up to $950. I’m just not sure if I can afford to spend this on a few cycles, much less on 1! She was talking to me about not having fertile CM b/c of the Clomid so I was thinking of Pre-Seed, just not sure if it works. Today I think I’m just overwhelmed and in the discouraged section of this whole process. When is enough, enough?…that’s what I’m struggling with. I have faith in God that He will provide to His will for our family but there’s that desire placed in my heart. We will definitely adopt one day but my desire is so strong. I know I’ve said this before but it only gets harder when I spend so much time with our friend’s kiddos, I love them so and treat them as my own…I’m just patiently waiting for my turn. The only reason we’re in such a ‘hurry’ is b/c we don’t know how long I will have a chance to even possibly conceive. So, I’m off my whiny box;)

My Corpus Luteum

In the right pic you can see my Corpus Luteum, proof that I ovulated this cycle…and funny that it was from my right ovarie, b/c that’s where I was hurting during ovulation! She said that I had a ‘string of beads’ on my left ovarie just waiting. Lots-o-Blood

They had to do a full blood panel on me to check for any diseases, HIV, and the like.My blood I’m used to blood by now that it didn’t particularly phase me! I asked her if she minded that I took a pic and she chuckled a bit saying that she’d never had anyone do that before! Leave it to me to put people in awkward situations. She took 5 viles!!

So, I’m not sure what I really got out of this apt. other than I need to hit the lottery soon…but it will require my faith to build even stronger than it already is. I talked to Gabe after I got back to work and he relaxed me in my crazy emotions. He knows how much this hurts me, emotionally and physically, but doesn’t want me to give up. At first it was hard convincing him to want to bring a child into this world with my kind of medical problems but as the months/years have gone by he’s really looking forward to it. He talks about ‘our baby’ like we’re already pregnant, it’s the sweetest thing. So I leave you with another pic…a goodie bag they gave me: 19 days worth of Rx prenatals!Prenatals


Yay for Insurance!

The nurse called back from our new RE to let me know that my insurance will cover all diagnostic testing (minus 15% copay)!!! That was great news and I’m overly excited. So, sonograms/x-rays/hsg etc. is covered! I was really worried about this b/c if we had to pay for it out of pocket, well a baby was never going to happen.

Also, our friend (the one with the maternity pics) Shantelle, is in labor as I type. I plan to go see her during lunch, I have to work late tonight. I’m excited to see her baby girl…Josalyn

UPDATE: She’s dialated to a 7 and ready to push in a hour or so!Shantelle

Off the the RE!

The nurse called yesterday and told me that it wasn’t a MC so it could be a few different things and Progesterone Test 3considering my situation I will live! I started my 4th cycle of Clomid yesterday and hoping for something good to come out of that! The last few cycles we say we’re gonna BD everyday but we either are tired, away on work, or mad at each other…I told Gabe that no matter how angry I am (the meds do that to you) we still have to do the deed. Here’s a pic from my blood drawl, maybe it’s overdone b/c I take pics each time but after this is all over and I have my ‘take home baby’ it’ll be nice to look back.  After work on Wednesday Gabe surprised me with dinner, we haven’t had dinner out in FOREVER! It’s hard to stay at home and not do anything but at least we’re getting some bills paid off, it’s about time.

I have an appointment with a RE on Feb. 23rd…so big countdown till then. They’ll have to do a full exam and blood/hormone tests but the neat thing is that they have a full lab in the office, so no sending things off and waiting for results. The only thing I’m worried about is funding and what Tricare will actually cover. We have nothing in savings and if we had to come up with thousands and even hundreds within a couple of months we’ll have to postpone everything for awhile. Please pray for us…we surely need it! I ultimately want to go in and her give me a magic pill to put a baby in me, but I’m not so sure that’ll happen. www.embryo.net

So I told you that we have a plan to visit all the Texas State Parks and each weekend we’re supposed to go to another but this weekend we might just stay close to home. A good friend of mine told me about this walking/biking trail close to our home that has a beautiful waterfall on the way through and I’m surprised that we never even knew about it. I think we might go down there this weekend but as for next weekend I’m planning a Vday picnic at the place where Gabe proposed to me!!